WHEN the Teen asked me last year if she could see Pierce the Veil and Sleeping with Sirens (who?) with her friends at the Forum in London I reluctantly agreed.

"You will have to stay with your Uncle William," I said.

"Of course. Will's cool."

Well, that was six months ago. The gig was this weekend.

Her two friends arrived at 6.30am to catch the 7.15am coach animated with talk of Mosh pits and Topshop.

As a cotton wool mother I decided to keep up with events through my brother's Twitter feed, he has about one million followers and is just a little bit addicted.

8am I'm up early aren't I. Why so? My neice is staying over with her chums today. This is just awful.

salvageable with 12 XL pizzas. #UncleTips

12 Off to central

5 Gotta take a bunch of emo yolo teens to Nando's now before they go to a yolo teen emo heavy metal concert. I am not joking

5.10 I'll be in Nando's Kentish Town if anyone wants to point and mock

5.20 Erm, pierce the veil and something brides. I don't know. It's all eyeliner and flicky hair.

Dial. "Will, the girls have brought you a large bottle of Jack Daniels as a thank you. Have they given it to you?"

Fear had gripped me that they had headed off into Kentish Town with a contraband litre bottle of whiskey.

They would get drunk, pass out and then God knows what.

"No," he laughed. "But they didn't go out with any bags so don't worry."

7 The YOLO kidsz have disappeared into the bowels of Kentish Town Forums Emo Festival.

7.10 I'm trusting the emo youths to get home by themselves. The tube is only two minutes walk from the emo party. I told them not to mosh it up.

11.30 I've not heard from the emo yolo teens yet.

12.30 The kidsz are back. They don't want beer, rum or whiskey or even tea. Kids today eh.

12.45 No one got hurt and no one got drunk. Sounds ****

9am The emos have found Borat on sky. They're howling with laughter

9.20 Sadly scotch pancakes contain no scotch at all, same as Bourbon biscuits. A complete con.

11 Shad Thames

2 watching the rest of Devil's Due with pre-Shoreditch pizzas

Dial. "Will, I gave the Teen my credit card and pin number with a strict limit. How many bags does she have?"

"About 10, maybe 15. Each. They couldn't walk."

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