One of the great things about the BBC is its training. Over the years Correspondents acquire courses like Scout badges. Mine included location safety, battlefield first aid, risk assessment, off-road driving, hostile environments and, finally, Outside Broadcast (OB) commentating.

My first test commentary was over recorded OB pictures of Tony and Cherie Blair’s triumphant 1997 entry into Downing Street. I’d got the usual crib-sheet of facts which I eked out and – a la Dimbleby – disguised as random thoughts. “Wasn’t it Disraeli who once said: ‘I’ve climbed to the top of the greasy pole’?”

I’d been told the test would last five minutes. So while I talked I listened to the director in my earpiece. “Camera three go to close-up on Blair; Chris mention the woman with the hat; Birmingham we’re coming to you in thirty seconds… Chris, wind up now, you’re handing over to Edgebaston and Carole Walker, in 10, nine, eight…”. And I did it very smoothly: “Now, from the excitement and jubilation here in Downing Street over to the peace and calm of Edgebaston …”

And at that point the real test started. The director said: “Chris the Birmingham link has failed. We’re staying with you; you’re still on-air. Ad lib till we tell you to stop.” And I had to chat for another five minutes, simply about what I was seeing, and with no notes to fall back on.

Why do I mention this? Simply because I’ve just spent three fascinating hours at the Playhouse watching the Describers – the team who give a running commentary for the partially-sighted – preparing for Absent Friends, the latest production. Have you ever tried describing a stage-set or the actions of people who aren’t speaking? I didn’t think anything was tougher than OB commentating, but this comes close.

Because one of the problems is that actors sometimes dry or fluff their lines or miss whole chunks of dialogue or mis-time their entries and exits. All this you must explain to those who can’t see what’s happening.

The Describers’ leader, Ann Weston, is seeking new volunteers. She wants people who speak clearly, write succinctly (you must speak between the actors’ lines) and have time available. After training, you work in teams of three.

If you think you’ve got what it takes, please contact her through the Playhouse on Salisbury 320117.


The audio-description commentary-box at the Playhouse. Could you tell partially-sighted people what was happening?
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