THE clue really is in the title with this one!

Now where did I put my glasses this time?

People might not believe this, but here goes. Hand on heart, it’s true.

I went to Tesco to get an eye test. Because it’s easy and free to park there.

But I couldn’t find any glasses there that I wanted, so I popped in to Specsavers in town next day, ordered two pairs (BOGOF, naturally), and made an appointment to pick them up last Wednesday.

Where did I go last Wednesday? Tesco. Why? Don’t ask me. Autopilot.

The nice young optician there trawled in vain through his computer files for a record of my purchase before looking up and saying in a puzzled tone: “I just need to double-check your details.”

A good few minutes of further searching took place, with me trying not to look impatient or tap my fingers on the counter, before it suddenly dawned on me that I was in the wrong place, after which I couldn’t get out of there fast enough, I felt such an idiot.

Fortunately, he saw the funny side. As did Specsavers when I rang to apologise for my absence. And they arranged to fit me in next day.

But honestly, you couldn’t make it up, could you? I thought my husband would greet this tale with a weary, seen-it-all-before kind of shrug.

But no. He chuckled and told me about the time he rang an energy company to complain that they hadn’t sent him a statement for ages.

“That’s because you switched to another company nine months ago, sir,” came the reply.

* RELUCTANT as I always am to rubbish our wonderful Wiltshire Council (!), I do have doubts about this wheeze of theirs to make us show ID before they’ll let us in to the dump.

Firstly, I’m not sure it’s worthwhile. It would be astonishing if anybody from a neighbouring county bothered to drive through our city traffic and queue up for ages in order to make use of our inadequate recycling facility.

For goodness sake, you’re not even allowed to drive forwards into a space now. You have to reverse, and that can be an embarrassing manoeuvre in front of amused onlookers, given how little room there is on top of the ramp to turn an old workhorse like my Honda CRV.

It’s so much less trouble to go to Amesbury, and that’s what many people from Salisbury do now.

Secondly, if any outsider does put themselves to all that trouble, they’re not going to disappear quietly back home, taking their unwanted belongings with them, after they’re turned away.

I can’t believe it won’t lead to more fly tipping.

We shall see.

anneriddle36@gmail.com