OCCASIONALLY in life you come up against an event that makes you reflect; in my case the May bank holiday weekend was the birthday of my wife. But not just any birthday but one that is referred to as a ‘significant’ birthday (the words you use when it would be impolite to mention the actual number). This thought process on numbers starts the brain along a track of considering other significant numbers that are part of my life, for instance married for 41 years, four children spread across three continents, six grandchildren also spread across three continents.

This all seems neat and packaged. However as with most people this is far from the truth; at times my life has been untidy and desperate. In my early teenage years, I thought the world was conspiring against me when I lost my father in a tragic accident and my mother was unable to cope, in a way these years fashioned my life to some extent. I am keenly aware that many people suffer tragedy and some people’s stories are so tragic that it makes me want to cry as I read them.

When I start looking back there is one truth that is common for all of us, that there are times when we all need a little help. I know that people like to be independent and brave words are spoken about financial and spiritual self-sufficiency but I have never met anyone who in truth did not need some help. Maybe as you reflect on your own life you might recall dark times when despair crept into your life, or you can think of family and friends who are experiencing problems.

For me, while I am one of those people who has a certain pride in working things through, it is a fact that I am where I am today because people at the right time and in the right way helped me. In nearly all the cases those people gave unconditionally but I will always be grateful to them; sometimes the helpers were family or friends but in other instances they were strangers who had nothing to gain from their giving except the giving itself.

Recently I have had the honour of becoming the chairman of Alabaré; a charity that specialises in giving help to people. Some of the people we help are desperate and have heartbreaking histories and stories and will need significant support, others need a little sustained support, others just need some timely support to get their lives back on track and move on.

As Alabaré chairman I try to assist in giving a little help to others; I feel privileged to do this.